It’s 7am in the morning, I’m supposed to be getting ready to head out but I figured what the heck, I’ll do a quick short post anyway!

I recently tested this technique out and trust me, it does work! I’ve managed to successfully use this technique to get people to feel as though they’ve known me for a long time! Now, you must be wondering what kind of benefits a skill like this might bring you. I’m not suggesting anything but think along the lines of dating and building relationships and you’ll arrive at your answer!

The secret in getting anyone to feel like they’ve known you for a very long time?

Bring that person to 3 different locations in a single day!

Somehow, this process will manage to ‘trick’ the other person’s brain into thinking that you’ve known each other for a long time! Before the brain can get use to a place, it gets hit with something new and then just before it adjusts, it gets hit with something fresh again!

Test it out yourself! See if it really works!

Alright. I know this is a little overkill but I figured, since I havent posted in so long, maybe I might do a double post this morning! I know I’m not too good a story teller yet, and I know that with enough practise, I’ll a superb one someday!
There once lived a professor who was usually a very jovial person. He was known to joke wherever he went and he was very popular amongest his students. One day, he entered his class with a calm, composed look on his face. He looked his students straight in the eyes and told his students the assignment for the month. He said “I want you to take this assignment very seriously. I want you to live your life the way you would if you found out that you only had 1 month to live. At the end of the month, you will write a 5 paged report on the outcome of the experiment.” A few of his students thought he was joking the way he usually did and began to laugh it off! The thought of having only 1 month to live? You’ve got to be kidding! He added, “Your report, which is to be submitted on the last day of the month, will determine whether you graduate or not.” After which, he left the class. The students were stupified. Some of them sat there in their chairs wondering what just hit them. Many still thought the professor was kidding. A few days went by and the students began to worry. They tried to contact the professor but he seem to be uncontactable. No one knew where he went and no one heard anything else of him. The days went by and finally, a month passed. With the ring of the school bell, the professor reappeared. He strolled into the classroom, this time his own jovial self again. He made jokes and managed to get all the students laughing. Somehow, he acted as if the month never happened. Then, he broke the atmosphere by asking all the students to submit their reports. What do you think was written on those reports? What kind of change do you think those students experienced in their lives living everyday knowing when they were going to ‘die’? Would you live you life the way you’re living now if you knew you had the same fate? So many times we live through our lives attempting to chase the end of the rainbow. We go through the same cycle over and over again and many of us have lost our perspective and reason to live in life. I’m not saying I can help you find that reason to live. All I’m doing here is showing you a way how you can find that driving force again. Ask yourself this. What would I be doing now if I know I only had 1 month to live.

Have you ever wondered why some people seem to keep quarrelling? Do you know of any couples, families or even close friends who have drifted apart of broken up because of a series of quarrels? Take a look around you and look at how many people are fighting, these numbers are on the rise in Singapore, just because they don’t see eye to eye. However, have you for a moment ever wondered why people quarrel? Why people who seem to care so much for each other still seem to be able to love/hate each other? Here’s a simple explanation why. Read on only if you want to find out how not to quarrel with your loved ones again.

Different people have live their lives through the eyes of different lenses. Some of them may be family orientated, others may centre their lives around money, goals, their spouse, church or religion, or even their children. What this means is that people react very differently when faced with a similar problem. This also means that because of the different orientations or different centres in their lives, people tend to end up quarrelling just because the other does not seem to have the same values!

Let’s take an example of a loving couple. They both come to a decision to go to the movies, so the wife takes the initiative to book the tickets. However, later in the day, the husband’s boss tells him that because of the busy season, he has to stay in the office to work overtime. Now, if the husband were career or money orientated, he would probably call his wife up and tells her his situation and at the same time, expect her to understand. However, if he lived his life around his spouse, meaning to say that his wife overruled the job, then he would definitely tell his boss no. Seems like everything sounds great so far! Let’s carry on and see what happens if we put the wife into the picture.

If you put yourself in the shoes of the wife, who happened to be someone who valued having fun over her career, what do you think you’d feel if your husband blew you off at the last moment, especially if the both of you had already been planing this date for awhile now? Likewise if you were a career-minded woman who only constantly thought about making money, what do you think you’d feel if you found out that your husband told his boss no?

While the above scenario seems somewhat mild, it is interesting to note the possibilities if we carried this mindset to more serious matters!

What I hope I’ve managed to do with this simple post is this. Every person leads his life through a different lens. It is rarely possible to expect the other person to fully understand what you want. If you wish to lead a life with as little squabbles as possible, what you need to do is to look out for the other person’s values. This is a common technique in NLP. If you manage to find out his values in life, you will be able to understand him better and ultimately, you will be able to understand why he does certain things!

If you’ve read the papers in Singapore recently, you might have noticed this huge article on personal motivators, NLP trainers and public speakers in Singapore. Some of them command fees of up to $15,000 while others about $2,000. Before I even start to comment on whether or not these people know their stuff, isn’t it interesting to note that even between these ‘great’ speakers, the price range is a whopping $13,000?

How is it some people are able to command such high prices and still conduct sell-out seminars while others are only able to command a much less fee? While the marketing tactics and strategies may play a role in the prices, wouldn’t you also agree that the way the speakers speak also does play a part?

Good speakers have known how to successfully use NLP, neurolinguistic programming, to direct their energy to propel them into super resourceful states. In addition, they also know how to control the states of the audience.

A great technique I’ve found out is varying the speed of your speech. In case you haven’t noticed, people who speak faster and which more expressions in their voices tend to be able to generate large amounts of energy in the room. In addition, through the use of gestures, body language and tonality, speakers have been able to engage the audience more fully!

These trainers rarely are born talents. They usually are very hardworking people who go through intensive training before even achieving a fraction of what they are today. What I hope to put across is this. If you want to be a great speaker, you have to start practising today. Put yourself in situations where you will be forced to speak. Train yourself daily and I guarantee you, one day you will find yourself speaking almost like them.

This is something out of a philosophy class I’m taking. If you take a step back and think about it, it kinda makes sense!

Here’s one view some people might take about life.

1) Me
2) My family
3) My friends and neighbours
4) My fellow citizens
5) My fellow humans

Here’s the other view

1) Thou shalt not steal
2) Thou shalt not murder
3) Thou shalt not break a contract
4) Thou shalt not make bad loans
5) Thou shalt not commit neopotism

If you took a slow look through each set of views individually, at seperate times, you might agree that these are the sort of values many humans live by. Here’s the tricky part.

If say one day you find your dad, you mum or a sibling of yours committing murder, what would you do? Would you cover up for him or would you turn him in?

Pretty tricky agreed? Take sometime to think about it and let me know how you feel!